• Will they ever learn?
    After watching the first Question Time
    of the most recent sitting of the House
    of Representatives, the only plausible
    answer to that question is a resounding NO.
  • Beware the ides of March
    While Shakespeare may have ‘popularised’ the term, the ‘ides of March’
    goes back to Roman times when March was the beginning of the year
    (giving the excuse for celebration and prayers that the new year would be
    prosperous) until 55 days were added in 46BC. Two years later ‘dictator for life’
    Julius Caesar was stabbed to death — linking March with turmoil for ever after.
  • Nailed it
    Unlike the residents of the USA; a lot of whom probably wouldn’t
    have been able to point to New Zealand on a map three months ago;
    we shouldn’t have been surprised at the consideration for others demonstrated
    by New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern in the past few weeks.
  • The tragic toll of hatred
    Stan Grant is an outstanding journalist. His capacity to undertake brilliantly forensic
    analyses and thereby discern meaning within the tumult of contemporary political
    behaviour sets him apart from most of his colleagues. So good are his political
    credentials that our PM invited him to enter politics, an offer Grant declined.
  • Bovine excrement
    Prime Minister Morrison seems to be certain that the next federal election
    will be in May. Cynics would suggest as Parliament is only sitting for two weeks
    in April, the plan is to hone their political sales pitch, pork barrel marginal electorates
    and parachute past or failed LNP politicians and their supporters into positions where
    they could potentially influence government programs and decisions into the future.
  • There is no Planet B
    This was written in the immediate aftermath of the Christchurch terror
    attack where 50 innocent people (at the time of writing) were gunned down
    by a lone gunman. It was going to be a rant against a number of
    Australian politicians who use racism and terrorism to further their own objectives.

The Political Sword

Get the inside track on the media and government.

Strutting the catwalk in Carbon Alley

Life used to be simple in Carbon Alley. The Fat Cats, Gina ‘Ginger Mog’ Rinehart, and Clive ‘Cheshire Cat’ Palmer, have been running the place, aided and abetted by their cronies, Officers Dibble (Tony Abbott) and Dribble (David Bushby). However, many of the alley cats, led...

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What have we done to deserve an Opposition Leader like Tony Abbott?

I’m fed up with Tony Abbott and most of his Coalition team. I’m fed up with his unremitting negativity. I’m fed up with his destructiveness. I’m fed up with his nastiness. I’m fed up with his attitude towards women. I’m fed up with his rabble-rousing tactics. ...

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The Waltons get the willies

As one of the foremost Forgotten Families, the Coalition Waltons have nothing better to do than to retire early for the night. However, still active behind the scenes, John-Boy (Howard) Walton can’t sleep. John-Boy: Psssst...Tones! You awake, son? Tones: Yeah, pa – can’t sle...

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‘Post-Truth Politics’

Or, How the ALP Should Play the Game of Political Pragmatism, Just Not as the Hollow Man Abbott Does. So, you will by now have had seared into your brains the immortal words Tony Abbott uttered to his party room this past week: “In a choice between policy purity and political pragmatism, ...

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Julia Gillard’s Fireside Chat - Your Heath Mark 2

This is a second attempt to craft a set of messages about health that PM Gillard might transmit, modified in the light of your comments and suggestions, some of which have been included verbatim. An attempt has been made to generalize and personalize the ‘chat’ using ‘we’, &l...

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Julia Gillard’s Fireside Chats – Your Health

This is the second of a series in which contributors to The Political Sword are attempting to fashion examples of messages that our Prime Minister might give in her 'Fireside Chats'. The idea of Fireside Chats came from David Horton in a piece titled: The ragged trousered philanthropist on The Wate...

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A Minder, kinder, gentler polity

It’s an early morning start for Tony “Arthur Daley” Abbott at his ACTION MOTORS car-yard (“Arthur’s Commodores – Trade-Ins Or Newies”). However, as he alights from his car, he can’t help noticing that his rivals across the road (Gillard’s ...

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Julia Gillard’s Fireside Chats – A Price on Carbon

Introduction by Ad astra In a piece titled: The ragged trousered philanthropist on The Watermelon Blog, it was David Horton who suggested that PM Gillard should consider instituting ‘Fireside Chats’.  Quoting from Wikipedia, he related previous attempts at ‘fireside chats&rsqu...

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The curse of the leading question

It is often the nature of the question that determines the answer. Moreover, no matter what style of question is posed, the authority of the question is conditioned by the power relationship between the questioner and the questioned. People in a submissive position are more inclined to give the expe...

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A day can be a lifetime

G’day Swordians! Do you remember, or can you imagine, the heady days when The Beatles toured Australia in 1964? Unfortunately, the Mersey Mop-heads never returned to our sunburnt shores, but, fortunately, their spirit was kept alive Down Under by massive vinyl-record sales and due homage paid ...

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Clowns to the Left of me, Jokers to the Right, Here I am, Stuck in the Middle with the ALP

Recently I have noticed, as have others, that as The Greens’ voice gets louder, and as the Conservative Party of Tony Abbott takes more positions on issues than the Kama Sutra, as it drags Labor to the Right or outflanks it on the Left if it suits them to do so, so long as it is in opposit...

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We’re ‘aving Nan of it

Joannie Taylor (‘Nan’) from the Catherine Tate Show is visiting Australia to spend some time with her grandson, Jamie, who has got a student visa to study at Rooty Hill University. On campus, Jamie has joined the Young Labor Club, and has invited a few of his new chums over to meet Nan. ...

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Should Labor hitch itself to the slogan waggon?

One aspect of contemporary politics in which the Coalition has outstripped Labor has been in its use of slogans. Coalition slogans have been simple, often just three words, understandable, plausible, memorable and successful in promoting the Coalition’s agenda. Because its agenda has been larg...

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Sideshow Sam

Aficionados of The Simpsons cartoon series will be familiar with the ‘colourful’ character, Sideshow Bob. For those of you who haven’t had the pleasure of viewing any episodes that include Bob, he is basically a psychopath, who worked for Krusty the Clown in his circus, got sacked...

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It’s time for the ALP to drink a protein word shake and muscle up to the Coalition

      “They couldn't sell a cold beer on a hot day.” How many times have I heard that said about the ALP lately? A point which was reinforced in my mind with reference to the Democrats in the USA when I read a Paul Krugman article, Let's Not Be Civil, recently; bu...

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A Right Royal Wedding

With a Royal Wedding in the offing, the Coalition should be full of the joys of Spring, revelling in bonhomie and offering best wishes to the young couple who are just about to tie the knot. However, for the Coalition, it was the worst of times, and showing signs that it was about to get even worse...

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How do you think about climate change?

Reading two books in parallel recently proved to be an informative exercise. One was Richard Dawkins’ 2009 The Greatest Show on Earth – The Evidence for Evolution, the other Tim Flannery’s 2010 Here on Earth – An Argument for Hope. It was informative because the two books exe...

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Why do Only Fools and Horses Gamble?

As part of his anti-problem-gambling crusade, Andrew ‘Del Boy’ Wilkie manages a Centre for the treatment of gambling addicts, which is trialling his new, ‘BetaGorn Program’. This involves the addict being given a smart card with a $200 daily limit which, when exceeded, fails...

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Not quite joined at the hip but in the same ballpark

I will now attempt to elucidate the points I think Menzies' speech has in common with the PM's thoughts about Labor's polity ensconced within contemporary Australian society, thus to prove how it is not heresy to say that, yes, Menzies and Gillard may have something worthwhile in common with eac...

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Blackadder Bolt

In France, the First World War is at its height and the Australian ‘SG’ Regiment is doing as good a job as any in providing top-class cannon-fodder. General ‘Melchie’ Murdock (on loan from the American Army) and Capt ‘Blackadder’ Bolt are in command of the Aussie...

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